Have you noticed how self-centered our society has become? Everywhere we turn, from social media to news headlines, the message seems to scream, “Care about yourself and no one else.” It’s a troubling trend that has deeply influenced the way we live, think, and even relate to one another.
Recently, I came across an article in The Wall Street Journal titled The Valorization of Selfishness. It wasn’t written by a Christian author—in fact, the writer is quite anti-God—but their observations were fascinating. They explored how selfishness has become a driving force in our culture, shaping decisions as significant as whether or not to have children. According to the article, many of these decisions are rooted in fear—fear of sharing time, fear of being less self-centered—not in moral principles or instinctual desires.
Therapy Culture and Self-Justification
We’re living in what’s now called a “therapy culture.” Therapists are busier than ever, and access to counseling has expanded through virtual platforms. But have you noticed the underlying message that therapy often promotes? Instead of encouraging accountability or self-reflection, it often amplifies the narrative: “Do whatever makes you feel good.” Conflict with someone? It’s their fault. Feeling unhappy? You’re the victim.
Even forgiveness—a cornerstone of healing and growth—is being pushed aside. An article in The New York Times recently dismissed forgiveness as outdated. But how did we get here?
The Power of Unexamined Beliefs
The root of this issue lies in what’s called ideology—beliefs we don’t examine because we don’t recognize them as beliefs at all. They become the lens through which we view the world, shaping our values and actions without us even realizing it. Social media, for example, has fueled narcissism and normalized terms like “gaslighting” and “toxicity,” but it often fails to challenge the ideology driving these behaviors.
What’s missing from this cultural narrative is any sense of moral responsibility or obligation to others. Traditional therapy once questioned selfishness, encouraging people to grow through selflessness and humility. Today, the mantra is simple: “If it feels good, do it.”
A Countercultural Call
As believers, we are called to live differently. The New Testament is clear: we are to love God with our whole heart, soul, and mind, and love our neighbors as ourselves (Matthew 22:37-39). This is not a superficial self-love but a love rooted in understanding our true identity as defined by God.
Loving our neighbor goes beyond mere affection—it’s a call to serve others, to treat them with dignity and worth, even above our own. This stands in stark contrast to today’s culture, which prioritizes personal happiness above all else.
The absence of absolute moral truth in our society has allowed selfishness to thrive. But as followers of Christ, we must resist this tide. We need to examine how much of this cultural ideology has seeped into our own hearts and lives.
A Call to Prayer
I want to leave you with this challenge: pray over this issue. Reflect on how culture may have influenced your own mindset, pulling you away from the biblical standard. Ask God to help you align your heart with His truth and to give you the courage to live counterculturally in a world that desperately needs His love and grace.
Colleen
